43

For 43 months I have been changing diapers. Apparently, about 43 months is my limit.

If you recall, my very talented, smart, super awesome son pretty well potty trained himself. I was simply part of his support staff.  One morning, he woke up (on our first big snow storm in Dec 2010) and said to me "NO DIAPER!"  From that day forward, he worked on perfecting his new skill.

Sure, we had a few issues (ahem, peeing outside like the dog is not really acceptable, I prefer we use the indoor facilities).  This summer, Connor decided to night train himself. Again, it was his telling me, "No more pull-up, only big boy pants."  Hence why I have 2 unopened giant boxes of pull-ups in my basement.

All in all, Connor is trained and it's AWESOME. He told me he was ready, so we went for it! He did all the work, I was along for the ride.

Then there is Calista.
The girl.
The one who should be easy to train, so the books say.
Old wives tales tell me a girl should be easier too.
Books lie.
So do old wives.

Yeah, she's pretty resistant to the whole potty concept.  I read that age 2 years 3 months to age 2 years 6 months is the "golden" window for training.  She was 2 years 6 months on 2/13/12.  I have been trying to patiently wait.  Waiting for her, like Connor, to tell me "NO DIAPER."  I think she's more apt to starting speaking fluent Mandarin Chinese, like her beloved Kai Lan. I fear she likes her diaper. I fear she likes it too much.  Stupid diaper.

Due, to a few "incidents" this week, I'm done with diapers, changing tables, and the like. DONE. My limit is 43 months of diaper changing.  I even canceled my next diaper order, I am THAT done. It sort of started when I realized she is too long for her changing pad.  This causes her legs and feet to hang off the edge.  Which now means, she can kick the basket on the changing table that holds her diapers, wipes, etc.  Now that she knows she can reach this, I have been spending a few days cleaning up kicked over diaper basket paraphernalia.  A smart person would just simply move the location of the basket, instead, I am waging war with a stubborn 2 year-6month-2day-year old.

I do not care to play this game any longer.

This will not be easy. I am hoping she decides she want to try this. I have great bribery celebration treats for her.  I thought she would run to the potty and go, in order to obtain one of Disney's coveted Princess Figurines. I was wrong. She could careless. Same with M&Ms, suckers, a new bike, etc. Nothing.

I am screwed.

I will continue to try, already today she embraced her Jesse "big girl" pants. She understood that if she "wet" Jesse and Bullseye, that they would cry.  As she pee'd on the floor, she exclaimed, "Oh No, Jesse crying." Crap. Thank God we are stocked up on carpet cleaner.  This happened in my office, so, what's a little kid pee mixed in with cat pee and previous owner dog pee. This carpet is like a pee magnet. Maybe once everyone is done peeing on it (due to great drugs, I think the cats have ceased peeing in here), I can get new flooring. Well, that was off topic.

Yes, Calista, Mommy is trying to bribe/beg you to pee in the potty. I will try to work together with you, but soon, you will be out of diapers. And I will just buy more carpet cleaner.

We are trying to celebrate her staying dry (we used this technique with Connor), but she just doesn't care.  I fear this will be an epic struggle, ending with me telling Amazon to go ahead and send those 167 count of size 5 diapers. FYI, Connor was trained before he even fit into size 5. I hope to God I don't get to see size 6 diapers.  I am just going to tell CC, they don't exist. 

I think CC won round 1, she asked for her diaper and I gave it to her.  It's baby steps right?  Plus, our Lori (sitter/cousin) is here and it would be EVIL to just leave her with CC peeing all over.  Maybe after lunch we can try again.  Then again, Lori did help with Connor, so, maybe I can just get her to do it?  Good thinking, right?

Sigh, this is my Mommy job.  I should not pass this off on anyone. My mother-in-law offered to train CC while I am on a business trip next month.  I accepted, but it just doesn't feel right.  I should really help, kind of another Mommy right of passage.  I have a few weeks before I leave, so hopefully we can make a little headway.

Here's hoping CC decides to play nice and potty on her little potty. Fingers crossed. If that doesn't work, maybe I'll bribe her with a pet penguin.